Do the opinions of others dictate your life?
Should the opinions of others matter to us? Is seeking favor or approval from others something we could imagine living without? We all at some point in our lives worried about what others thought or said about us and in the process subject ourselves to worry, stress, anxiety and other physical ailments.
The essential message of this 13th verse of Tao Te Ching seems to be that it’s crucial to remain independent of both the positive and negative opinions of others. Regardless of whether they love or despise us, if we make their assessments more important that our own, we’ll be greatly afflicted. Seeking the favor of others isn’t the way of the Tao.
~Wayne Dyer from the book ‘Change your thoughts, Change your life’
What caught my attention to the above paragraph is the word independent. There were two definitions that I found for this word.
- free from outside control; not depending on another’s authority.
- not depending on another for livelihood or subsistence.
Opinions of others: What are you really seeking?
What are you looking for or expecting to hear when you ask someone for their opinion?
I remember when I wasn’t sure about myself or my confidence wasn’t at it’s par. I would ask others what they thought about _____ or what should I do about ______, and their response wasn’t what I expected.
I believe that asking others for their opinion in some weird shape or form is asking for comfort in our insecurities. So be careful who you’re asking because as the bible states…
“Fools have no interest in understanding; they only want to air their own opinions”
I have to say, each event is different. Yes, there will be times when the opinions of others are needed and will make a difference. But, it shouldn’t be something we should depend on. We have to trust our inner guidance and be connected to our higher self so that we can help others become independent and not dependent.
You need to find that balance of where you manage your expectations; where seeds are not planted in your mind that can cause you to question yourself and decrease the confidence and self esteem that you’re trying to build.
Practice Trusting Your Own Inner Nature
Every passionate thought that you have regarding how you want to conduct your life is evidence that you’re in harmony with your own unique nature-your fervent belief is all you need. Your worldly self isn’t your true identity, so trust your eternal self to communicate with you. It will do so through your inner nature, where you’ll honor it through an independent mind. Respect your vision and trust your natural, passionate thoughts that are aligned with the loving essence of the Tao. ~ Wayne Dyer
Opinions of Others – Your uniqueness is what makes you, YOU!
There is only one YOU. You are special. Your thoughts, your feelings, your spirit does matter. No one can take better care of you, but you!
Take time to practice trusting your own inner nature. Try living one day completely in harmony with your own true self, ignoring pressures to be anything else. Act on what you love! Put yourself as a priority in your life instead of others, because in the end we only have one life to live.
How much time we have, no one knows; so what do you do in the meantime? Do we live life loving ourselves, building and trusting our inner nature/guidance, or do we live life worried about the opinions of others?
The choice is up to you. Therefore, follow your heart and not the opinions of others. Trust and believe in yourself, in your abilities and know that you can do this!!! Have faith in yourself!
With Love, Appreciation and Blessings!!
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This is week 15 of our Saturday Morning Mastermind study of “Change your thoughts Change your life” by Wayne Dyer
Read Chapter 13 – Living with an Independent Mind
Then Meet us here for a LIVE discussion March 26th at 10am EST